This book in its entirety is one big amazing quote

Bypasses are devices which allow some people to dash from point A to point B very fast whilst other people dash from point B to point A very fast. People living at point C, being a point directly in between, are often given to wonder what’s so great about point A that so many people from point B are so keen to get there, and what’s so great about point B that so many people from point A are so keen to get there. They often wish people would just once and for all work out where the hell they want to be.

*

The Hitchhiker’s guide to the Galaxy also mentions alcohol. It says that the best drink in existence is the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster.

It says that the effect of drinking a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster is like having your brains smashed out by a slice of lemon wrapped around a large gold brick.

*

‘Now it is such a bizarrely improbably coincidence that anything so mindboggingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as a final and clinching proof of the non-existence of God.

‘The argument goes something like this: “I refuse to prove that I exist,” says God, “for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing.”

‘”But,” says Man, “the Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn’t it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and therefore, by your own arguments, you don’t. QED.”

‘”Oh dear,” says God, “I hadn’t thought of that,” and promptly vanishes in a puff of logic.

‘”Oh that was easy,” says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing.

*

‘Can we drop your ego for a moment? This is important.’

‘If there’s anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.’ Zaphod glared at her again, then laughed.

~”The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” by Douglas Adams

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

This planet has – or rather had – a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much all of the time. Many solutions were suggested for this problem, but most of these were largely concerned with the movements of small green pieces of paper, which is odd because on the whole it wasn’t the small green pieces of paper that were unhappy.

~

And then, one Thursday, nearly two thousand years after one man had been nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be to be nice to people for a change, a girl sitting on her own in a small café in Rickmansworth suddenly realized what it was that had been going wrong all this time, and she finally knew how the world could be made a good and happy place. This time it was right, it would work, and no one would have to get nailed to anything.

Sadly, however, before she could get to a phone to tell anyone about it, a terrible, stupid catastrophe occurred, and the idea was lost for ever.

This is not her story.

~”The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” by Douglas Adams

Star Wars Vs. Star Trek

Star Trek is about a trek, a journey, a series of missions that bring humanity farther out into the galaxy so that we can learn more about ourselves. It’s about exploring, learning, and discovering new things: “To boldly go where no one has gone before.”

Star Wars, on the other hand, is about wars, conflict, and the battle between good and evil that’s fought not only on the battlefield but within our own souls. Star Wars is about seeking adventure, uncovering secret plans, rescuing princesses: “Restoring freedom to the galaxy.”

~“Star Wars Vs. Star Trek: Could the Empire kick the Federations ass? and other galaxy-shaking enigmas” – by Matt Forbeck

And this is why I prefer Star Trek over Star Wars.

In a fantasy-town

The heads of malefactors or enemies of the state will be on stakes somewhere – you may recognize one of them as having belonged to a GOOD man you encountered earlier and rather liked – or perhaps there will be picked-clean skeletons hanging in cages along the sides of the streets, performing the same function as streetlamps, except after dark.

~”The Tough Guide to Fantasyland” by Diana Wynne Jones

Quotes concerning the least important character in the book

“Ah, Rincewind,” he said, and, because he was not a determinedly unpleasant man, amended this to, “Professor Rincewind, of course.”

“I would like permission to fetch a note from my mother, sir.”

Ridcully sighed. “Rincewind, you once informed me, to my everlasting puzzlement, that you never knew your mother because she ran away before you were born. Distinctly remember writing it down my diary. Would you like another try?”

“Permission to go and find my mother?”

***

The older members of the faculty exhaled as the two heads left. Most of them were old enough to recall at least two pitched battles among factions of wizards, the worst of wich had only been brought to a conclusion by Rincewind, wielding a half-brick in a sock…

Ponder looked across at Rincewind now, and he was hopping awkwardly on one leg, trying to put a sock back on. He thought he’d better not comment. It was probably the same sock.

~”Unseen Academicals” by Terry Pratchett

Apes

Apes had it all worked out. No ape would philosophize, ‘The mountain is, and is not.’ They would think, ‘The banana is. I will eat the banana. There is no banana. I want another banana.’

~Terry Pratchett – “Unseen Academicals”

About people who do

If I see something, a piece of work, a painting, a film, anything, and somebody’s going out on a limb and doing it, I admire them. I don’t even care if I like it, I just admire them, because they’re doing something that a lot of people won’t do. You meet these people who build weird sculptures out of cars in the desert. I mean, you have to admire those people more than anybody.

***

As for reflecting any increased happiness of my own – I don’t think I could ever really be content. I don’t think anybody who tries to work in the arts is ever really content – the minute you are is the minute it probably stops.

***

~Tim Burton in “Burton on Burton”

Burton on Burton

Instead of encouraging you to express yourself and draw like you did when you were a child, they start going by the rules of society. They say, ‘No. No. You can’t draw like this. You have to draw like this.’ And I remember one day I was so frustrated – because I love drawing, but actually I’m not that good at it. But one day something clicked in my brain. I was sitting sketching and I thought, ‘Fuck it, I don’t care if I can draw or not. I like doing it.’ And I swear to God, from one second to the next I had a freedom which I hadn’t had before.

***

But what’s odd about Disney is that they want you to be an artist, but at the same time they want you to be a zombie factory worker and have no personality.

***

They wanted it to have more of an upbeat ending, but I never saw it as being downbeat in any way. It’s funny, I think it’s more uplifting if things are left to your imagination. I always saw those tacked-on happy endings as psychotic in a way. They wanted me to have the light click on and have his dad come in and go, ‘Let’s go to a football game or a baseball game.’ That was my first encounter with the happy ending syndrome.

***

It’s very hard in Hollywood because people like things literal. They don’t like it when you leave things open for interpretation, but I like it very much.

***

I’ve never been able to predict or think what an audience would like to see. I’ve always felt: how can anybody else want to see it if I don’t want to? And if I want to see it, and nobody else wants to, then at least I get to see it. So, there’s one person who’ll enjoy it.

~Tim Burton in “Burton on Burton”

Coffee

Dale Cooper: Harry, I’m going to let you in on a little secret: every day, once a day, give yourself a present. Don’t plan it; don’t wait for it; just let it happen. It could be a new shirt in a men’s store, a catnap in your office chair, or two cups of good, hot, black, coffee.

~Quote from Twin Peaks